Zicmu n°81 (Avril) : Braguette

comme d'hab' le dessin d'édito du zicmu.

  • le texte, histoire de percuter :

Je monte dans ma voiture. Je mets la radio à fond. Je me gare juste devant la terrasse du restaurant en "freinant un coup sec. Les gens me regardent et s'aperçoivent forcément que j'ai le dernier modèle turbo méga'' 50litres, 79 soupapes en W. Ils sont impressionnés. Tel le toréador, je jette ma veste sur mes épaules. De mon index, je pousse mes lunettes de soleil sur le haut de mon front. Je ne regarde personne.'' Je traverse lentement la terrasse en allumant un cigarillo. Je vais droit au comptoir et je sers la main du patron, comme si je le connaissais depuis toujours. Je lui offre un verre et lui demande si ma voiture ne dérange pas. Il me répond qu'il aurait dit oui si ça avait été une 2 cv ! Je lui propose un cigarillo et le lui allume avec mon briquet en or, orné d'une femme nue sur une face et de mes initiales sur l'autre. Je'' m'accoude au comptoir, face à la ''salle. Les gens me regardent avec des sourires et des mimiques admiratifs." Peut-être sont-ils envieux ? Le serveur s'approche de moi en souriant. Il va sûrement me féliciter à propos de ma nouvelle voiture. Je me sens tout drôle après qu'il m'ait dit à l'oreille ces quelques mots : « Ta braguette est ouverte ! ».


Zicmu n°81 (Avril) : Braguette


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